One day I was at the beach. Something was coming from the water and it felt like an earthquake but it wasn’t. There was something in the water. Then I saw a bright light. It was a golden fish! Everybody was stunned. They all left because they were scared but I didn’t leave. The golden fish and I became friends. We decided to take him home and keep him as a pet. We fed him food and we entered him in a competition. It won a rarest fish competition. Later we sold him for 5 million bucks. But now I wish I had my fish back.
I like the part with the golden stuff!
This starts so well, but I think you rushed the end a little. A great idea, but try not to rush ….. Keep the ideas flowing.